WANT TO CHANGE, AND WANT IT ENOUGH TO PUT IN EFFORT
Grandmaster Wong Kiew Kit
Question
I came from a dysfunctional family and my best friend and older brother (father figure) was a gang member and went crazy and suicidal more than a few times which led to fights between me and him. I have quit all drugs now and also saw a shamanic healer who journeyed on my behalf for which I am very grateful. I feel much better now and stable but still have bouts of depression and fear and I believe energy imbalance.
— Bradley, USA
Answer
Congratulations for leaving drug use behind and starting a new life. In the words of a Chinese saying, if you regret your previous wrongs and start to lead a righteous life, you are worth more than your weight in gold. Irrespective of whether you will be very successful or lead a normal life, if you are righteous and kind in your dealings with others, and find simple joys in whatever you do, your life here will have been very meaningful. In this way you will soon find your depression disappear.
Depression is a result of imprisoning your spirit. The causes of this imprisonment are many and varied, but you need not have to know them in order to be free from depression. What you need to do is to free your spirit.
There are numerous ways to free your spirit. Practicing chi kung, such as “Lifting the Sky” or “Carrying the Moon”, is one excellent way. Another excellent way is what I have described to you, which is taking in the strength and guidance of God or your divine being, leading a righteous life, being kind to others and finding simple joys in whatever you do.
The gentle flow of divine strength and guidance through you will open the blockage that has imprisoned your spirit, your sense of righteousness and kindness will ensure and nurture this divined flow, and finding joys in simple things will let your spirit expand. If you can also practice the chi kung exercises, which you can read from my books, your result will be enhanced. But even if you cannot practice good chi kung, the method I have described to you will be sufficient to free you from depression.
Surely you would like to help your older brother to lead a meaningful life too. You may like to teach him the method I have described for you, but you shouldn't, at least not now. If you tell him the method, not only it may not help him, it may even spoil his chance of using it in future. He is not ready, his heart is still close. You are different. You have regretted your previous wrongs, and not only you want to live a better life, you took steps to do so.
A good way to help him is by example. When he sees that you are peaceful and happy, he may want to be too. When he asks you how you change your miserable life to a happy one, you should not tell him my method yet. He is your older brother and your father-figure. Hence you lack the kind of impact on him to make him change. Most likely he asks you out of curiosity, or at best for theoretical information. He may not carry out the practice.
What should you do, then? Ask him to write to me, or seek the advice of a spiritual teacher. He must want to change, and want it enough to put in his own effort.
The above is taken from Question 2 June 2006 Part 2 of the Selection of Questions and Answers.
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